The Power of Storytelling When Raising Children
25 Nis 2023
According to French Anthropologist Edgar Morin, human beings differ from other living beings not only by being a conscious being, but also by being both conscious and unconscious, both intelligent and insane. If you have a preschool-aged child, this sentence by Edgar Morin is easier to understand.
The main reason why preschool parenting is difficult is that life is difficult for a preschool-aged child. He struggles with great difficulties all day long to cope with the dozens of emotions he has just encountered, to gain a place in society, to be approved by his family and loved ones, and to meet many other expectations.
From this perspective, a preschool child is similar to a person living in the stone age. He is very sensitive and unprotected to what is happening around him. Moreover, he shares the same basic skill that keeps cavemen alive: telling stories.
Stories are sometimes preliminary preparations and sometimes re-enactments of the emotions and situations that children will encounter in daily life. They are the tools we use to protect them from wrong behavior and to guide them to the right way. The story of the Shepherd and Pinocchio are stories we have been telling for centuries to prevent children from lying.
So, are stories really useful?
The answer is a simple yes. In addition to their many cognitive functions, from short-term memory development to the ability to dream, perhaps the biggest task of stories is to prepare children for reality and expand the narrative space of parents. Let's look at an example:
"Don't do that" vs. "Telling a story"
“Don't touch it, you'll get burned.” etc. “You know, when I was a kid we had a neighbor. He was around my age too. We always played together in the garden. One day, he reached into such a boiling kettle and his hand hurt very much. It hurt so much that he didn't leave the house for days, he cried a lot. When you extended your hand, that came to my mind. I wonder what he's doing now? Well, he too became as big as me. Maybe he got married and had a wonderful child like you.”
Messages Given in the Story:
Hot objects hurt.
If I get hurt, I cry a lot.
Getting hurt interferes with fun and play
My parents were once children like me.
My parents think I'm a great kid.
Messages Given in the Sentence:
I shouldn't touch this thing in front of me. (For no reason)
I leave it up to you which child is more likely to avoid the kettle after hearing the story. But I want you to know that the point is not to stay away from kettles, but to find a way to communicate better, more indirectly, and more fun with our children as they look at us with infinite curiosity.
This is where the power of story comes into play.